Sunday, September 28, 2014

Procrastination, Daydreams, Football, Writing, Updates, the Bible and why Sunday is an evil day.

I would have written a far more clever title if I had any creativity left. Sorry.

So. Confession time: I am a procrastinator. It's terrible. I know I need to fix it, but it's just such so easy to procrastinate. Terrible project to do? Fuck it. Let's watch South Park. Need to call that friend you never want to call? Eh, let's play some sudoku. But it's getting worse. I ended up watching something about Ted Bundy's "Death Row Tapes" today while avoiding doing something. While I usually love true crime and psychology, it was freaking creepy and I wasn't very interested (probably because it was creepy and I didn't know what was going on). Yet I kept it on.

I thrived on procrastination in college. I was lucky enough to be a pretty good writer, or to be a pretty good bullshitter, to finish up papers that were due the next morning. Or many times, due that very day. I had the gift, man. It was amazing. The only problem was that if I decided, say, to try to finish my paper two weeks before... nothing would happen. No ideas, no words, no inferences from the text (that many times I didn't read... Fucking Wordsworth*) to creak through the empty halls of my brain. No, inspiration hid like a bitch until it was almost time for me to hand the stupid paper into the distracted professor. Suddenly my paper exploded into words, opinions and appropriate quotations. Magic.

Things are different now. I'm older, I'm a little overwhelmed, and I haven't had written assignments due in a long, long time... So now when I'm faced with just one challenging paper, my mind desperately wants to check out. And sadly I've become fully acquainted with procrastination's dear friend--daydreaming. Whoa, have I been daydreaming such impossible things. I've been daydreaming so hardcore lately that I finally got fed up with it and googled "cures for daredreaming". None of it was particularly helpful but I guess I know I'm not alone, right? I mean, this is Extreme Daydreaming.

The thing is... it's Sunday night. It's after 11. Tomorrow's itinerary doesn't look all that appealing. I can't bear it. And that's the problem with Sunday... IT IS A DAY CONDUCIVE TO PROCRASTINATING! It is evil, damnit, evil! The day speeds by, too, until suddenly it's 1am and you haven't even done half the things you were supposed to do before bed. THE WORST.

So I decided, in my typical heretical fashion, to work out my frustration over procrastination and Sundays by using 3 or 4 bible verses. Maybe some of it will motivate me. Let's go.

  • You also must be ready, for the Son of Man is coming at an hour you do not expect.”                                                                                       Luke 12:40
  This is hilarious. It's like, oops, better do this paper in case Jesus comes tonight. "Tommy, can you please pick up your socks, please, for the hundredth time! Jesus could be coming, Jesus Christ!' Bottom line, don't procrastinate doing anything because Jesus is coming and you're not clued in on when.

  • Then the kingdom of heaven will be like ten virgins who took their lamps and went to meet the bridegroom.                                                 Matthew 25:1,12
I'm trying to stop laughing, hold on... Okay. Look. This is actually part of a larger parable, commonly known as The Parable of the Ten Virgins. The story is that some of the brides were wise and procured oil for their lamps, while the foolish had none. The foolish have to go buy oil and they miss out on the bridegroom's arrival. In typical God fashion He's mad at them for this. Check it out:
  • ‘Truly, I say to you, I do not know you.’ Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour.                                                                    Matthew 25:1,12
 I don't know you?  Gee, thanks, God. Lovely. Girls, if you're dumb and excited, God ain't gonna wait for you. You're screwed. 

  • "A lazy person is as bad as someone who is destructive." (Proverbs 18:9 GNT)  

            Well, I guess I'm screwed. 

*Maybe I need to come back to William Wordsworth. Obviously I love and appreciate him now. I rebelled against that class back then, not thrilled with the boring professor and the interminable reading assignments. But it's not fair that I complained about him, and really the most inspiring quotes about life, about what we're all doing, come from him. They might not be specifically be about procrastination, but they focus on the bigger picture. What's important. I want to share a few before I segue into football (random, I know). 

“The eye— it cannot choose but see;

we cannot bid the ear be still;
our bodies feel, where'er they be,
against or with our will.” 

“Come grow old with me. The best is yet to be.” 

“Our birth is but a sleep and a forgetting...” 

“Sweet is the lore which nature brings,
our meddeling interlect
mis-shapes the beautious forms of things.
we murder to dissect” 

Never been much of a sports person, but I've always been curious and envious of those who are die-hard fans. It seemed like there was a world, a language, that I didn't understand and couldn't be a part of. I've actually felt the urge to learn about football before because I love the Fall and I love everything that makes it the best season. I never did anything about it, really, because hello? I'm a procrastinator. 

BUT some wonderful, fabulous, talented genius got me interested, and the team he's introduced me to is  one that just has it. I'm loving learning about them, about football, about becoming part of something bigger than myself, and he is the best mentor. This diversion has been great lately, and has made me super happy. I wish I could write some poetry about it but definitely not after William (William, I'm sorry! I'm sorry again, William! You are one of the greats, I was a fool!). So the procrastinating/daydreaming can't be helped in this instance. And I don't want it to be! This is my new legitimate hobby :) I need something like this to balance things out.

Finally, the site rejected my Color Me Your Color doc--there was some problem--so I'm going to fix it and re-post. I have to edit it on here, too, because the layout was a mess and I missed a few things. I have a bunch of stories I'd like to finish this month (October). Plain Gold Ring is the next mountain I'll climb. I have a bunch of stories ready to be begun, but I'm being good. I'm dedicated to finishing what's on my plate. No more procrastination here. It's been tough now that I'm pursuing a different course in my life and I'm busier than I ever remember being. Everything is just so much more active in my life that even when I sit down, fingers perched over my keyboard, I have a hard time gathering up enough creativity to really put out a story I'm proud of. The good thing is I'm getting used to my new schedule, and I refuse to cut out the things that keep me happy and entertained. Writing such filth happens to be one of them! 

Have a good week. We can make it to Friday, guys. We always do. Until then, let's procrastinate the shit out of our work, have some filthy daydreams, and quote the bible to people who complain at work. Much love.

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